Harden Your Heart?


When Parents HurtDr. Joshua Coleman (author of When Parents Hurt) sends out a regular email message to his email subscribers (you can sign up to receive these messages for free at drjoshuacoleman.com).

Today’s message resonated deeply with me.  This is where I’m at right now.  Unfortunately, I’ve discovered that keeping myself and my heart completely open to my estranged children runs the risk that I may end up back in the hospital on Suicide Watch again.

I don’t ever want to feel like I did that day.

Here’s an excerpt of what Dr. Coleman said in his message today:

What’s often required is a perspective that’s a little more resolute, a little less sympathetic to your child’s position, and a lot more detached from what they’re thinking and feeling. … It’s a way of saying, “Know what? I worked hard to be a good parent to you, I’m still willing to do that if you want to play ball, otherwise, I’m going to shut down that chamber of my heart that has your name dedicated to it and concentrate on things I have to be grateful for. Change your mind and I’ll hear what you have to say.”

 

Sigh.

I can’t say I’ve fully achieved this disconnect, but I’m starting to work on it. As much as it breaks my heart to do so.


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